Bumble at the Test: No Gayle, Sarwan, Dwayne Bravo or Taylor… it"s a crying shame

Bumble at the Test: No Gayle, Sarwan, Dwayne Bravo or Taylor… it's a crying shame

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UPDATED:

20:57 GMT, 18 May 2012

Absent friends
West Indies' Jerome Taylor

The toast on Friday was to absent friends. No Chris Gayle, Ramnaresh Sarwan or Dwayne Bravo here and also no Jerome Taylor (right), who bowled West Indies to victory over England in Jamaica three years ago but has disappeared from the scene. It's a crying shame…

Van's the man for us

Happy to say that my football club, Accrington Stanley, are in good hands after my London meeting with new chairman Peter Marsden. I can reveal we might make a bid for Arsenal's Dutch striker Robin van Persie and can offer him a good package – as many pies as he can eat and a weekly ticket to the local Odeon.

My tweet hell

Plenty of abuse on Twitter from India – and all because of my support for Chennai Super Kings in the IPL! It's not my fault they haven't reached the final! Some of these keyboard warriors would be candidates for A&E if they met me face to face…

Fashion victims

Lots of fashion statements among the West Indies players. Opening bowler Fidel Edwards has stars shaved into his hair, while his new-ball partner Kemar Roach has some serious gold round his neck. Lots of ear-rings, too, but I'm old-school on these sorts of things. They should only go with high heels.

Delicious Danni

England's Danni Wyatt

Great to see the launch of The Cricket Paper featuring the Mail on Sunday's very own Peter 'Reggie' Hayter. I've had a brainstorming session with him and reckon there should be a 'crickette' on page three. Who better to start with than Danni Wyatt (right), England's feisty all-rounder

Tuf to remember

Phil Tufnell's new book Tuffers Tales was on parade and I asked him what was in it. 'Lots of stories,' he said. 'What about, Cat' I replied. 'Can't remember,' said Phil. Reminded me of when Keith Richards of the Rolling Stones said: 'If anyone knows what I've been doing for the last 10 years, let me know…'